Anger, Angry, Irritation, Arguing, Argue

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Growth Online Anger, Irritation, Arguing
Knowledge Base

by Roy Posner and MSS

Definition of Anger
What is anger? It is an incapacity. When do we become angry? Whenever we cannot accomplish, our first response is anger. If one really wants to get rid of anger, first he must understand it. Each time anger rises in him, he must watch himself. He is sure to find himself impatient, incapable and ill-informed. This is a general definition. There are exceptions. The exceptions are many.

Roots of Anger
Anger rising is rooted in lacking or depleted energy, missing information or knowledge, and surface living.

Thoughts on Anger
Anger is emotional ignorance.

Absence of understanding of the environment or oneself or both generates anger.

Anger is the vital's claim of a non-existent right.

Anger is the desire for domination by the hasty unthinking vital.

The man who is angry about solving a problem is like the mechanic who beats his broken machine with a stick as a method of repairing it.

Unity banishes anger. One who has realised unity with the world, has nothing to be angry against. (MSS)

Anger
Among other things anger can be precipitated by frustration, fatigue, and something wanting inside consciously or unconsciously confronted.

Anger
Never show anger. Anger is an indication of an unresolved problem on your side, related directly to the matter at hand or to another matter. A clear examination of the feelings behind the anger will uncover a weakness or poor attitude, opinion, thought, or condition on your part. Once you discover it, change it for good. Watch your life thereafter take a dramatic turn for the better.

Insights into Anger
-95% or more of the time when a person is angry he will, upon close examination, found to be wrong in his perception of things at the time. This suggests that there is never a justification for anger. Therefore we must be vigilant about our anger. If it is coming on, we must immediately put on the breaks, and at a point thereafter trace down and understand our psychological limitations behind our negative expression.

-There is also another dimension to this that we have also observed. If a person is angry, it is very often the case that the inverse of what he was angry about will prove to be true. E.g. a manager is angry at a subordinate for not doing a certain work that had been delegated to her because a second worker was unable to do that work. Upon inquiry one finds that in an earlier situation the manager had been negligent in getting the second worker properly trained when the subordinate required her to do some work. Thus the boss was negligent in this earlier situation, which reflected as anger in the inverse new situation. In this way we can trace back life's underlying truths from its falsehoods!

Consequences of Anger
Anger, even an intensity of angst-ridden negative thought, attracts not only negative life response but hostile forces from within or without that can enable serious consequence.

Anger Cancels Success, Attracts Failure
Serena Williams and Roger Federer, consistently the two great tennis champions of the past few years, were on the verge of another championship at the US Open, one of the three most important matches of the year. However, both in their corresponding decisive matches, and in very critical moments near the end, got very angry by an umpire's decision. From that point on, things went downhill for both, and they each lost the match. If they had only controlled themselves, they would have released positive energies, enabling life to conspire in their favor. In other words, they would have won the match.

You see this dynamic often in sports, where someone's temper near the end brings down the entire effort. One of the most memorable occurred when the coach of the Sacramento Kings professional US basketball team twice in two consecutive years got angry at the end by a call in the final moments of the game when the team was on the verge of winning the championship, attracting their stunning and sudden demise.

We can all learn from such experiences; whether involving, or its lesser form, irritation. Both attract ill-fortune.

The Sublime Result of Turning an Attitude Positive
The other day I was driving along down the highway, when I turned on my radio. I tuned into a show that gives career advice, which is on every weekend. I listen to the program on occasion, admiring the host's insights into many matters, but sometimes being put off by a certain line of thought he occasionally drifts into.

This time as I began to listen to the show, I caught myself and decided not to indulge my annoyance with his occasional outbursts, and remain still in my feelings. Within a few seconds, he began to speak of matters I had never heard from him before, including the power of self-givingness, of not trying to force your ideas on others, the importance of listening, and so forth. I was utterly astonished that he would say such things, for he had never expressed such sentiments before when I was listening!

I was once again privy to the life response power of controlling a wanting attitude. At the point we withdrew an annoyance or misgiving, positive conditions suddenly present themselves. Not only does it come in ways in ways you would never have imagined, but a sweet richness envelops your person and you are left with the thought that life would be infinitely sublime if you took to such efforts all of the time.

Overcoming Anger through Non-Reaction
Question: I lose my temper. I find it difficult to control my anger. What can I do?

Answer: I would say the key is to develop the habit of non-reaction � to others and events as they unfold. In a recent discussion with GJ who was discussing with half dozen individuals the vast commentary of Karmayogi on Pride and Prejudice, we agreed that having the poise of non-reaction to others, to events is the single most important thing to remember when starting out and carrying out the day. From that poise, irritation and anger will cease to arise.

For example, when your wife or other relative appears at the end of the day, the first thing to remember is not to react, to their stress or anything else. We can take that same approach with employees we are about to see, to a meeting we are going to, etc. It is a spiritual poise of silence and being. From that position, we become silent witness to the unfoldings of the world.

If we want this and practice this method continuously, eventually it becomes second nature. Interestingly, as a result of taking this approach, the people we come upon will themselves become more positive, reducing the chance of our ire rising against them. (It is life responding positive to our psychological effort.)

Anger rises not only from our nervous reaction to intense outside stimuli from others, events, and the environment, but to our own ignorance of conditions outside ourselves; to an innate frustration of what to do when we have no control or power over it. Anger also comes from reacting to things we do not like, that we ourselves embody. For example, in the British tv series House of Eliott, one woman was upset about another who was doing negative things to her business, when in fact her jealousy over the other person's work attracted the negative conditions from her in the first place.

Whatever the cause of anger -- weak nerves, ignorance of the truth, something mirroring a wanting attitude inside -- a poise of stillness and non-reaction is a powerful way to avoid anger and irritation. From there, the deeper knowledge of why we react so strongly to certain things will reveal themselves.

The Subliminal Influence that Checks Irritation

How often in the course of our days are we irritated by the smallest of things. The average person will allow the irritant to play out in his mind, if not outside himself in his actions. While it is true that we have the ability to control our behavior in these situations, yet we persist and simmer inside.

There does not seem to be an obvious mechanism to catch our sudden irritated outburst -- whether caused by reading something we do not agree with, or when someone makes an offensive comment that does not meet with our approval. The need to respond in a reflexive manner -- whether in our minds, or by shouting out at the TV screen, or by sending an email, or through other forms of crude behavior -- invariably plays out uncontrolled.

But what if there was an inner power that could control our irritation. What if we could discover a deeper consciousness, which would establish the poise by which we could widen our perceptions and relationships with life, thereby controlling the need to react to that which strains our nerves?

As we take to this inner orientation, we develop a �witness consciousness� that silently observes the world from within. From these silent depths, our nature is softer, is steady and calm, and is more embracing of the myriad conditions of life. From that poise, we are less likely to react to circumstance; rather we instead embrace all things that pass our way as the natural order of things; that flow towards a logical outcome.

In addition, from this poise, we experience sweet, positive intimations rising from the depths of our being, providing guidance on what to do and what to avoid; constantly reminding us to remain steady and understanding no matter what the prevailing conditions. This then becomes the decisive antidotes to the persistent bothers and irritations we experience in the course of our lives.

In addition, through that right poise and right reaction, we are far more likely to attract instances of sudden good fortune. E.g., by not reacting to a potentially irritating quarrel occurring nearby, the person in line ahead of us suddenly informs us of a very important upcoming event that we will prove very important to us. By not reacting in these situations, we have set in motion events that align with our own interests and intent.

When we discover our deeper nature, our True Selves within, we establish the calm and steady poise by which we become one with life�s conditions instead of recoiling from it in irritation and anguish. It is a sign one has made significant progress along the spiritual path.

Anger Toward the New and Reversal of Consciousness
When there is something new in an environment of unfamiliarity, people often object. It is a disturbance of habit. If there is also anger, it is indicative of something more untoward -- requiring a reversal of consciousness on their part. Sometimes that reversal comes from within, i.e. someone makes a psychological change in attitude, belief, etc. Other times it is expressed through the outer requirements of life, as was your husband's case through his cylinder changing duty. Very often it is both. Perhaps that was actually the situation for him.

Anger vs. Soft Strength
Preventing the expression of one's anger in one moment, and softly expressing a strength in another are distinctions of power worth cultivating.

Negative Life Response to Intense Emotional Negative Reaction
Whenever there is an intense emotional reaction, there is bound to be a setback of some sort immediately following it.

Anger, Irritation in Pride and Prejudice

Eliza over Wickham�s non-arrival to party

Mrs. Bennet constantly

Untitled
Even a fairly advanced spiritual man can experience sudden outburst of anger, for the seed of physicality is entrenched deep in the inconscient and subconscience within, and in the attraction and repulsion of sensation in the physical substance of the body.

On Irritation
Thought in the descent changes irritation to joy, as irritation is the thought of impatience in the physical. (MSS)

[I.e. mind looking down below it, i.e. into the vital and body movements can become aware of irritation (thought of impatience in the physical part of our being), and then change it, turning the experience into joy.]

Overcoming Irritation through Yogic Movements
How to be vigilant so we are not caught in the clutches of daily life, and avoid irritation? It is not so simple, requiring an integral approach. One method is constant rejection of false movements. But this is not so easy since we forget, or are not aware, or can't separate ourselves from them. We are too caught up by life. However, moving to the silent depths within makes this possible, as we are more mindful, vigilant of such movements. From that deeper poise, we are still, and can perceive and reject them as they rise. Meditation and other methods can help create that inner silence. Also, the more we consecrate, the more that inner silence builds over time. In addition, when we consecrate/offer upcoming events Mother, the better those conditions will be in the first place, reducing negative circumstance.

Inner orientation and poise (concentration), consecration, and rejection together loosen the knot of irritation and similar movements of the lower nature, the physical consciousness, including anger, fear, worry, doubt, hate, etc. It takes a lifetime of dedication to overcome millions of years of negative programming in our being. That is one of the great purposes of Yoga, which is conscious evolution.

Irritation as Revealer of Weakness
Whenever you come up against something that irritates you in the course of the day, it is an indication of a corresponding weakness in yourself. Discover the corresponding weakness inside yourself, change it, and grow.

Learn from Anger, Irritation
We know that no good comes from anger, or even irritation. Whenever we feel either of these, we must immediately learn to stop it in its tracts. It only serves to reinforce our negative emotions or negative conditions. In that way, these two indicators of our lower "physical consciousness" can be very useful. Whenever they appear, they indicate something wanting in our being, or wanting in the conditions in our lives. When they express, we can thereafter sit back and wonder what it is that they represent in ourselves or in our situation in life. Once we identify it, we can develop a plan to overcome that inner or outer deficiency. In this way, we see that even the negative serves the positive.

Evoking the Darkness and the Light

The other day I had a memorable experience that was filled with irony. It was a life response of the highest order; one that was not only a continuation of a pattern of previous responses, but one which touched me and the recipient dearly. It was also one that brought out both the darkness and the light in life; literally and figuratively. Let me explain.

For nearly a decade, I have been attending meetings of MPUG, the Microsoft Project User Group in San Francisco. Held at the Microsoft district headquarters on Market Street, the gatherings have always been lively affairs in which we watched interesting and informative demonstrations, at the end of which prizes were handed out to lucky winners. It turns out that over the last several years, I had the good fortune of not only winning several of the biggest prizes, but often knew in advance which prize I would win, and at what point I would win it. In other words, I was able to predict a life response event before it occurred. I was able to accomplish that inner feat because on those occasions I had the subtle sense of how life was unfolding, and perceived how life seemed to be moving towards certain outcomes, including the disbursement of certain prizes at specific moments.

Just as startling was the fact that in the course of the last several meetings I won the exact same prize from amongst many. Moreover, in each situation, I proceeded to give the prize away to someone else who had need for it, since I had little use for that product myself. In other words, because I knew that life tends to repeat, and because I sensed the subtle unfolding of circumstance on those particular occasions, I sensed in advance that I was going to win that precise prize, at what point it would occur, and if I did, knew I would probably give it away. It is with that background that I would like narrate the events of our latest meeting.

When I arrived at the Microsoft district headquarters this time, I noticed that there had been some significant changes. Now the quarterly meeting was being held on the other side of the building. This indicated to me on some level that changes were the order of the day.

As usual, I arrived a little early that evening, and instantly saw our host and main speaker talking to several members gathered around in a group. As a result, I held back from bursting on the scene, and waited in the large break room to gather and prepare myself for the upcoming meeting. A while later, I summoned up the courage and entered the presentation room. Immediately, on entering the room, I was very surprised to see an associate of mine, who I had not seen at these gathering for a several years, and who also was the chapter�s previous president. Let us call this individual �J.� I was surprised not only because I hadn�t seen him at meetings for a long while, but he was the one individual I had a somewhat poor relationship with among the members. For example, in the past, we would clash on my participation and involvement, or lack thereof, in helping run the meetings; and also had difference of opinions about the quality of certain presenters. Most telling of all was that he had a conservative political and social bent and was not afraid to let me know about it. In any case, our past relationship was dicey at best, and yet there he was, the first person I met when I entered the large room to start this latest gathering of MPUG.

I should also point out that J and I had a common friend and associate, namely M, who was not only the chapter head who led every meeting, including this one, but was also about to make the two major presentations that evening. It is also true that I referred a half million dollars worth of business to M, which was a powerful response from life I have described elsewhere. Now as I pondered the current dynamic, I wondered if J would have such a harsh opinion of me since I had created the largest client for his friend�s business in its decade long history.

With these thoughts circling in my mind, M, as head of the chapter and host, began the meeting and proceeded to give the first of his two presentations. After he was done, I drifted to the back of the room where the refreshments were. A minute or so later, my occasional detractor and former head of the chapter J arrived there as well. I then commented how very effective M�s presentation was, and then went on to say that I thought that with such excellent presentation skills, he could indeed become mayor of a renown local town; something M indicated a passion for in the past. I then added that I would vote for him no matter what his political persuasion. To that J shot back with words to the effect that he would only vote for M if he had a conservative agenda, burst off, and returned to his seat, leaving me a bit stunned at his abrasiveness. Now as I sat there, I thought of our past experiences, as well as this latest brusque retort. My mind then focused on the current economic environment, and realized that like others, he still had not learned the foolishness of the laissez-faire view that had almost brought down the world economy. With that little flash of irritation, I quietly let out a charge of emotional and mental energy.

A moment later, just after the Microsoft rep that was in charge of logistics for the meeting had begun striking up a conversation with me about the smoothness of the meeting so far, the lights suddenly went out in the entire large room! Not only were we all now in the dark, but M, who was getting ready for his next presentation, could not easily see what he was doing. Immediately I understood that my flash of irritation had precipitated a negative response in the form of complete darkness,

Perceiving this, I decided from that point forward to withdraw any harsh feelings and emotions toward J, and instead foster cordial and good relations whenever possible. A moment later, M began his second presentation, as the viewers, except the overhead presentation, watched in the dark. Fortunately, the lights came back on not one minute into M�s speech, indicating that he was never discouraged by the darkness, so quickly attracted the restoration of the lights.

M�s second and very effective presentation ended an hour later, and now the prizes were being given out. I then recalled many of the astonishing events in the past involving the disbursements of these rewards; experiences I have documented in other essays. Once again, in this situation, all and everything seemed possible.

As the gift-giving proceeded, I saw a thick, valuable book on the table in front of the room. It turned out to be the same book that I had won on two or three previous occasions! It was now but one of 10 prizes to be given out. Those past experiences were remarkable, and yet there I was once again confronted with the possibility that it could occur a third consecutive time!

And so the prize-giving proceeded. This time however, my name was not selected for any of the first eight prizes. Still two prizes remained; that same valuable purple technical book, plus an online software application with a $3000 value. M�s helper then shuffled the remaining ballots to determine who would win the thick technical volume. At that moment, I once again felt the world disappear, while having the presence of mind to perceive that the same book come to me again. When M then called out my name as the winner, I was stunned, bemused, and ecstatic all in the same moment. When he then proceeded to hand over the book to me, I instinctively did what I had done on those previous two occasions when I predicted and won that same prize: I simply offered it to someone who could use it since I had limited use for it. I then called out and asked who in the group could use it. Immediately, the woman who was sitting right behind me said she did. I agreed, and M handed her the book. I then saw this as yet a third manifestation of what had occurred in the previous two meetings. Each time I serendipitously won that same book, I not only handed it off to another person, but it was given to the person I had struck up a conversation with previous to the evening�s presentations. On each occasion, I had shed my shyness, and took an interest in the particular person sitting next to me, engaging in conversation about why they were there, their needs in terms of the technology, and so forth. And in each meeting, it was the person who I had made contact with, sitting next to or just behind me, who called out that they wanted and had a need for the book when I offered it. It was yet another startling dimension to these events.

But there was more to be one more turn in these events. Because I had handed off the book prize, M now put me back in the queue with the remaining contestants for the biggest and final prize; the $3k 1-year subscription to a highly specialized online software application. When he then drew from the lot, I subtly felt a kind of whiteness, with everything going blank. M then announced the winner of the grand prize, and it turned out to be none other than myself! In that wondrous moment, I had the presence of mind to perceive that because I gave my previous prize to a person who needed it, I was put back in the cue, and then was put in position to attract the much bigger one.

I then stood up, both shock and bemused to receive the prize, while fully realizing the inner workings of the situation. How could I ever explain this dynamic to anyone! Then as I stood there and pondered the nature of the prize, I realized once again that I really had no need for it despite its great monetary value. And so once again I called out to the group and offered it to anyone who could use it.

What occurred next was one of the most astonishing moments ever. When I offered the grand prize to the group, a person just in front of me turned around and indicated that he could really use it. It turned out to be none other than my nemesis J! Stunned, I agreed that I would hand over the prize to him.

I then sat down in utter wonder at what had just transpired. In fact, over the next several moments, J stared at me with a very special look that seemed to be a wellspring of gratitude. It was so strong and heartfelt that it started to feel my own heart. Here was my one periodic adversary in the group, perhaps my only one in business in years, with an expression on his face that seemed to say �Are you really giving this to me? And is it really you whom I am receiving it from?� And in those moments when our eyes locked, I saw the welling up of emotion in his eyes.

As we see in this incident, when we change an attitude from one of irritation and hostility to one of goodwill and harmony, life quickly moves in our favor, life�s conditions shift to the positive enabling an enemy to become a grateful ally; cancelling the effect of past difficulties and tensions in a single instance. When I shifted from a flash of irritation that earlier had literally and figuratively evoked the Darkness to one of hope for hoped for goodwill, I set loose a vibration that had attracted the Light that expressed as a revelatory experience. It was truly one of the most memorable moments and delightful experiences of my life.

Inner Life that Prevents Reaction
Question: How can we avoid reacting to the negative influences and stupidity of others?

Answer: We have many fixed habits. It is hardwired into our being. It resides in the subconscious, even in the body. When we lose touch with our consciousness, we fall back to that lower state, including that of reaction. It is primal. The purpose of Yoga is to overcome that; which takes time. The spiritual Force overcomes time and can also bring an end to all such feelings of the need to confront or scold others for their foolishness and stupidity. Yoga is a process that is long-lasting, requiring time and dedication that serves to overcome the limits of the subconscious; of the physical mind that wants to react, lash out.

Life too is unconscious, and we easily get caught up in it -- whether from the social collective, the media, or certain other individuals. Negative vibrations quickly spread to us when we get absorbed in their negativity. It touches the unconscious parts of us and we react.

We are trying to overcome a million years of unconsciousness through conscious evolution, made simpler through deep spiritual knowledge. We can do it in 30, even 3 years if we are dedicated.

The more you grow, and progress, the more you see such negative. The more you are challenged not to get caught up in it. When the consciousness is settled deeply within, there is less reaction. You just smile, and quietly walk by without thought when such nervous challenges to our system arise. You become immune to stupidity. When we reach the Soul within there is always a Guide that tells us not to be caught up in this and that behavior.

It comes down to how serious we are to make the inner change that will bring about the elevation of our consciousness that will keep us fully immune from negative influences.

Yet another approach is to offer to the spiritual Force the sensitivity we have to such things. In combination with moving to the depths, we develop inner strength that is unaffected by the negative.

MSS Paper on Anger

Arguing
When two people argue, both are wrong, though perhaps each to a different degree. Whichever side you are on (and to whatever degree you are right or wrong in the argument), understand the source of frustration within yourself that precipitated the conflict -- the limiting attitude, habit, or opinion -- and then change it permanently. Your life can dramatically improve for the better from that day forward.

On Insistence
If you insist in the present, another will oppose in the future. If you withhold insistence, the other will at some point come around to your point of view.

On Eliminating Quarreling Amongst Friendly People
Often of people of low culture who like each other quarrel as a form of understanding one another better. This is the quarreling of individuals who have a vital (i.e. emotional) relationship, as opposed to the conversational interaction of people who have a mental relationship. After the quarrel, there is understanding, and then reconciliation. However, the tendency to quarrel remains.

Getting over such a relationship requires a certain patient understanding or humility or goodness to speak out and say, "Well, I was hasty. It was unpardonable on my part." This appears to be a small gesture between friends or relations, but it is significant. Once this is done, quarrel of this particular description may not arise again or at least for a longer time than usual.

To realise one's defects is introspection. To express it to the offending individual is cultured behaviour. (Paraphrase of MSS)

To Be Categorized

Anger (Effect of-)

Anger Always Catches Up to Us

Lately I have been watching the nearly 500 episodes of Star Trek across 5 different series. I am enjoying it, but also trying to absorb old and new life lesson examples.

Invariably I have again noticed that when a character is angry, whether wronged on the outside or not, they are soon forced to confront a limitation in their own being that the anger masked or was subtly indicative of. This occurs almost without fail.

E.g. in one episode of Star Trek Voyager Captain Janeway became very angry and distributed by a race that had done her crew and others horrible wrong. But when the episode unfolded we see that the anger foreshadowed a virulent attitude and psychological problem that had built up in her over the five year period she and her staff had being stranded in the outskirts of the galaxy.

Likewise, when Eliza in Pride and Prejudice was upset when the man she was amoured with (Wickham) did not show up at a party, not only did a series of bad things unfold for her in the next five minutes, but that same man would lead her family down the wrong path, and force her to confront the fact that she could be so gullible and taken in by such a nefarious character.

As we see in an infinite number of cases, when there is anger, almost without fail it masks something limiting psychological or otherwise, which catches up to one's self sooner or later. Whether we change what is wanting, is up to us; is our Human Choice.

Anger and Personal Fault

Fault in One�s Anger

Any time you are angry, your fault will be revealed sooner or later.

Being Upset

Getting at the Cause of Upsetness

Being upset indicates some limitation in your being, no matter what the external cause. It is best to control and avoid. Better still, go further and turn inward to discover its real cause, and then make the necessary adjustment in one's psyche or the external reality.

Irritation

Being Irritated & Losing Touch with the Field

If you are bothered or irritated by the foolish action of another, such as their crossing an intersection with head down viewing their cell phone, check to see if you yourself too have lost touch with the Field, with the flow of life.

Irritation and bother are indicators that there is an undercurrent of tension or disturbance within where we have separated from the stillness and serenity of Being, from our Truer Self, replacing it with surface reaction, supported by the physical and vital ego.

Therefore in the future when such situations arise, check your irritation, and consider if you have maintained a settled poise within. Finally, offer the entire matter to the spiritual Force; to the Divine Mother. Life will then provide you with fewer reasons to be irritated in the first place (!), plus a new level of consciousness will begin to settle within.

Anger

Return of Hot Words

Hot words have to be swallowed later. (MSS)

Hate, Anger

Serving Whom You Hate

If you hate a person, life compels you to serve him. (MSS)

Anger, Anguish, Frustration, Irritation

Agitation and Our Being

When people are agitated about something, you can be sure that at some level they had a hand in creating it; and that some sensitivity or sore spot has been touched. (2009-2011 Q1)

Cause of Anguish and Frustration

Anguish and frustration occur when you don't want to learn from the situation. You merely want things to remain as they are or as you believe they should be. (2009-2011 Q1)

Underlying Cause of Being Bothered

When in the midst of circumstance, you show that you are bothered emotionally, whether through irritation, anger, or fear, it indicates a hidden limitation in your being apart from the matter. There is something else unresolved, which can be ascertained and overcome. (2009-2011 Q1)

Anger Cancels Success, Attracts Failure

Serena Williams and Roger Federer, consistently the two great tennis champions of the past few years, were on the verge of another championship at the US Open, one of the three most important matches of the year. However, both in their corresponding decisive matches, and in very critical moments near the end, got very angry by an umpire's decision. From that point on, things went downhill for both, and they each lost the match. If they had only controlled themselves, they would have released positive energies, enabling life to conspire in their favor. In other words, they would have won the match.

You see this dynamic often in sports, where someone's temper near the end brings down the entire effort. One of the most memorable occurred when the coach of the Sacramento Kings professional US basketball team twice in two consecutive years got angry at the end by a call in the final moments of the game when the team was on the verge of winning the championship, attracting their stunning and sudden demise.

We can all learn from such experiences; whether involving anger, or its lesser form, irritation. Both attract ill-fortune. (2009-2011 Q1)

Overcoming Anger through Non-Reaction

Question: I lose my temper. I find it difficult to control my anger. What can I do?

Answer: I would say the key is to develop the habit of non-reaction - to others and events as they unfold. In a recent discussion with GJ who was discussing with half dozen individuals the vast commentary of Karmayogi on Pride and Prejudice, we agreed that having the poise of non-reaction to others, to events is the single most important thing to remember when starting out and carrying out the day. From that poise, irritation and anger will cease to arise.

For example, when your wife or other relative appears at the end of the day, the first thing to remember is not to react, to their stress or anything else. We can take that same approach with employees we are about to see, to a meeting we are going to, etc. It is a spiritual poise of silence and being. From that position, we become silent witness to the unfoldings of the world.

If we want this and practice this method continuously, eventually it becomes second nature. Interestingly, as a result of taking this approach, the people we come upon will themselves become more positive, reducing the chance of our ire rising against them. (It is life responding positive to our psychological effort.)

Anger rises not only from our nervous reaction to intense outside stimuli from others, events, and the environment, but to our own ignorance of conditions outside ourselves; to an innate frustration of what to do when we have no control or power over it. Anger also comes from reacting to things we do not like, that we ourselves embody. For example, in the British TV series House of Eliott, one woman was upset about another who was doing negative things to her business, when in fact her jealousy over the other person's work attracted the negative conditions from her in the first place.

Whatever the cause of anger -- weak nerves, ignorance of the truth, something mirroring a wanting attitude inside -- a poise of stillness and non-reaction is a powerful way to avoid anger and irritation. From there, the deeper knowledge of why we react so strongly to certain things will reveal themselves. (2009-2011 Q1)

On Overcoming Anger

A clear understanding can help you separate from the anger and reduce its intensity. You should understand

�         Whatever comes to you comes for your progress

�         Your reaction to any circumstances fuels the problem that disturbs you.

�         All reaction comes only from the EGO. When ego is removed, the problem and the reaction will subside.

�         Whatever disturbs you, it will lose the capacity to disturb you when you practice Non-Reaction. The less you react, the less power it will have.

�         Try to understand your own contribution to the problem. Instead of blaming anyone or everyone for what disturbs you, TAKE RESPONSIBILITY. See your contribution. Decide to remove it. Don�t blame others. There is a deep spiritual truth in this view, regardless of the external circumstances.

If you have Faith in The Mother, anger can immediately and fully be conquered by

�         Call Mother intensely

�         Each time the problem or the anger arises, consecrate it to Mother

�         Whenever you are quiet, remove the problem and consecrate each aspect to Mother � give the problem to Her. Dissolve it in Her Consciousness.

�         Anger comes when we have too little strength to handle the impact of life. Sit for Three Day prayer calling Mother intensely and forgetting the problem as far as possible. The Mother you remember and call Her, the greater your strength. The anger will automatically subside. (MSS) (2009-2011 Q1)

Anger and Negative Response

The expression of anger will attract negative circumstance. (2009-2011 Q1)

On Arguing

In any argument, both sides are wrong. It's just a matter of degree. (2009-2011 Q1)

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